Archive for January, 2010


About the birth and the baby

January 11, 2010

Labor was longer and more painful than I had thought but didn’t leave any traumas. I had the greatest midwife ever during the last 7 hours of the labor, a girl about my age with whom it was very easy to communicate.

To reduce the pain I tried out concentrated breathing, the shower, gym ball, an acupuncture procedure where sterile water is injected on specific points (hurts like hell for the first 15 seconds!) and DH was keeping a warmable bag on my back during contractions.

I had thought before hand I wouldn’t try out entonox since I’ve heard so much bad experiences but it turned out to be just my drug. At some point though none of these pain reducements were enough and I had been in labor for about 20 hours and was still only about 4cm dilated. The pain was too much and I requested for an epidural.  Despite the local anesthesia contractions were extremely painful and I hung to the entonox like my life was depending on it. The most beautiful words I’ve ever heard were midwife’s “you are finally fully dilated”. The pushing part took 45 minutes but it was really the easiest part of the whole experience. I chose the traditional position since I was too tired to try out any other and it was easy for me to find the right breathing (with entonox) and direction for the pushing.

We spent two nights at the hospital after our son was born and as he was doing very well we got to go home a day early. It was so scary and great at the same time to be home just the three of us.

Before he was born I had thought newborns to be the most fragile things in the whole world; how on earth could I handle one of them? Now that he’s 8 days old and we have managed to keep him alive and content I must say it hasn’t been as difficult as I thought beforehand.

He’s eating constantly, at least every two hours. And we are also changing his diapers at the same pace. He already reached his birth weight on Saturday which is very good; me and sis were poor eaters as babies (and beyond..) and it took us several weeks to get to that point.

DH has 3 weeks of faternity leave which is great; he cooks for us and holds the house together as well as changes diapers where as I concentrate on being a milk machine for the little one. We are having his christening next month, name was chosen already months ago. My sis and cousin are going to be godmothers and DH’s brother and goodson are the godfathers.

He is precious, he is a wonder and I still can’t comprehend all of this.


Bittersweet equilibrium

January 11, 2010

On the moment I saw my son’s eyes for the first time as he was lifted on my breast I thought about my granny and how similar their eyes were. Three nights after our son was born granny passed away at the age of 93.

I have a strong feeling in my heart that there was a reason why our son was born 10 days before his due date; so that granny could hear about his birth before her departure. Even though she was in very bad shape when my parents told her and not responding anymore, I want to believe she knew about him.

You are a flaming aurora borealis behind the mountains, a bright star on the northern sky. Have a safe trip home.

Graphic print I made out of an old photo of granny


Happy new year!

January 5, 2010


Our son was born on 3rd January at 3.33 after 24 hours of labor.

He’s weight on birth was 3125 g and height 49 cm.

The night was freezing cold, -25C but since he originated from freezer that was quite appropriate 🙂

The most absurd thing I’ve ever experienced in my life was when baby’s head was already out and rest of him inside me and he started to make sounds.

You know those documentaries about women getting boob jobs and the shootage right after the surgery? My boobs look just like those.

I’m a mom. Crazy.