Archive for August, 2008

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Why I don’t love public transport

August 25, 2008

It’s my first day of holiday and we are heading to Lapland on Wednesday morning. The weather is shitty and cold. And of course we both catched the flu while attending an outdoor concert on Friday and now our apartment is full of sneezed papers and empty mugs we’ve been drinking hot black currant juice from. I’m actually feeling much better already but DH doesn’t look so good at the moment snoring on the couch 😦 I visited the acupuncturist today and he put some herbal medicine on my face and forehead when I told him I caught the flu. And it seems to be working. I don’t know which spots he stimulated this time but I was like macaroni after the treatment and been really tired the whole afternoon.

This time he held his practice in a different place than usual and I had to take the metro to city center to see him. I hate the metro, seriously. Well not so much the metro as transportation but the co-travellers I’m forced to share my space with. Every single time there’s a drunk/junkie/crazy person/preacher in the same wagon with me. Every Single Time. The trip from us to the center takes only 12 minutes but it feels like an eternity when you are locked into a tin can with a maniac shouting in your ear. I’d rather take the bus but guess what, there’s no bus lines from us to the center. Hilarious.

During the three years I’ve lived in Helsinki I’ve come to master the behaviour rules of the subway. I’ve learned the empty zombie gaze you’re supposed to put on your face while traveling. See nothing, hear nothing, gaze a spot on the wall and pretend you don’t care about that person next to you reeking of piss, booze and vomit. You are not supposed to look anyone in the eye. But still I like to observe people and if somebody is staring at me I love to take a staring contest. Unless the other contender is a lunatic with a crazy look in their eyes. When I was visiting Paris one time my French (male) friends told me that I’m flirting all the time in the subway. In their eyes just looking at someone normally was flirting. So I tried to learn the universal empty subway gaze.

Finnish people are famous for their silence. Small talk is something we definetely don’t master. If there’s a bus full of commuters who are strangers to each others no one will utter a word even though the travel would take two hours. We definetely enjoy our silence. When I was living in Maastricht and took a bus once I was shocked with the noise the Dutch people were making, was so loud it hurt my ears. I was homesick otherwise too at the moment and so I dreamt about being back to Finland, in a bus with nobody speaking a word. But there’s an exception to this rule of course. If a Finnish person gets a phone call on their cell while on any public form of transport, they are more than happy to share their sex problems/diseases/criminal record loudly on the phone. It’s twisted, I know.

Today was time to enroll to night school courses. I attended metallography (I think art graphics is another term for this) last year after trying to get on that course for two years. There’s one lousy course in the evening in whole Helsinki and they only take 15 people in. I got to the office 30 minutes before the enrollment started and there were already 10 people before me in the queu, mostly old ladies. I filled my registration form and waited anxiously. Finally it was 4.30 PM and they opened the counters. At the same moment I started to dial the number where you also can enroll, but it was busy of course. I heard a boy next to me get through on his cell and he was enrolling to the same course I was going to. My course!!! And he got a place. I was getting so nervous, those old ladies before me talking so slowly, filling their forms with their shaky hands, moving so slowly and the time was running so fast. I tried to call again and again but it was busy all the time. And finally it was my turn at the counter. I threw my paper at the clerk and he was so slow too, hitting the numbers on the keyboard one at a time. A few agonizing moments passed. “You were the last one to get a spot on this course!” He uttered. “YES!” I screamed an ran away. I was so relieved. That course means so much to me, it was one of the main things keeping me sane last year. I love the various phases you have to complete when making a plate, I love the printing with an old press, I love the smell of thick paper and the chemicals. I love how the making of a picture swallows you completely and you have to concentrate so hard on the process you can’t think of anything else during the time you are spending at the course.

All these are etchings with aqua tinta, the last one has lace printed on the plate as well.

Night time

Night time

Sisters

Sisters

Tree

Tree

The bride

The bride

About TTC, now it’s CD18 and 5DPO. I’m trying not to hope too much this cycle but to concentrate on the next one with IUI. DH is going to see the acupuncturist too. So far I’ve had much less cramps this month, hooray for that! Some mild back pain as always this time of the month. I’m going to have my CD21 bloodwork on the way to Lapland, luckily you can do it at any medical centre you choose.

Tomorrow we’ll pack our backpacks ready and then head north. So it’s gonna be silent around here for almost a week.

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First RE appointment

August 21, 2008

So we had the RE appointment today, finally. I was quite nervous the whole morning before going there, I don’t know why. Our doctor was a really nice lady. Straighforward in her speech, which suits us better than fine. And we are in fact much wiser after this first appointment already.

It turned out that even though DH’s SA said that his sperm is fine, there seem to be some problems with the high antibody levels. This means that although he has a lot of good quality swimmers who move forward they can’t really reach their target because of abnormal viscocity.

I had the dildocam examination which revealed that I O’d probably yesterday from my left ovary. I thought so too, because the temp was 0.5C higher this morning. The doc told me however to stop charting, NOW, because it only adds more stress. So I’ll go bury my thermometer on the backyard. My ovaries, uterus and the uterian lining all looked flawless. My docs words: “you will certainly get pregnant with this uterus” 😀 Yay! She also said that I’m very likely to ovulate normally since I have regular cycles and have gotten positive OPKs and my tubes are open. Of course we still have to do the bloodwork to confirm that my hormones are working properly. I hope not to get any surprises there…

She said that they don’t normally start to plan the treatments on the first visit, but since we already had the SA results and my endo history papers she was comfortable suggesting IUI on natural cycle already for next month. I know it’s not the most effective treatment in the world but if the problem has really been with the swimmers not getting to the right place, not my endo, then it might do it! The doc said that she doesn’t “normally” start the treatments with IUI but in our case she thinks it might reall y do the trick. Can’t describe how excited I am! Now I only have to find out how to do my CD21 bloodwork in the middle of LAPLAND.

Yesterday’s gig was awesome. Those girls definetely rock!!

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Ouch!

August 20, 2008

I feel like a train had ran over me and there’s a bruise on my left shoulder. Half of the muscles in my body are hurting. Yep, the first kickboxing workout was yesterday. And it was so much fun :D!! I sweated like a little red pig but like a very happy pig! We’re going again on Sunday.

Had another appointment to the acupuncturist too. This time he put a needle on my head and one on my lower back (and also the needles on my belly as last time). It’s strange how the needles hurt diffrently in different parts. For example the needle on my head didn’t hurt at all where as the on on my lower back hurt so much I had to bite my lip. The next session is on Friday and yet another on next Monday. I’m going to go bankrupt over this.

It’s CD13 and I suspect I’ll be ovulating on CD15 or 16. It’s a good thing that the RE is tomorrow so she can check with the dildocam if I’m really ovulating or not! They can do that, can’t they?

Tonight we’re going to see these girls play! The song is about domestic violence and roughly translated “if you’ll hit me one more time I’ll kill you”.  One of the best current Finnish live bands I’ve seen.

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Weekend (and loads of food!) in pictures

August 18, 2008

On Friday I had my first appointment to the chinese acupuncturist. First got some needles on my lower back and few in my legs, then some on my belly and other side of my legs. Relaxing? yes. Expensive? definetely. 68 euros for a 40 minutes session, ouch!!! But I still booked two more sessions for this week, first one is tomorrow.

After the acupuncture I walked home and it was surprisingly warm. In the staircase I was greeted by a very good scent of food coming from our apartment. This is what DH had cooked for us:

Fresh pineapple, zucchini pancakes, apple/nectarine salsa, zucchini with feta cheese, salad with cucumber and pepper, sour cream, mix of parsley, onion and radish, chicken skewers and spicy meatballs. And ice-cream for dessert. Yumm! All this was consumed with a nice bottle of red wine from Chile. We are total food-holics.

Saturday involved eating aswell. We drove to my parents house in the afternoon after first taking our cats to DH’s father in another town. I think I inherited my love for food from my parents, because they love cooking and eating as much as we do.

My parents' house where I grew up

Me and mom cooking. See the matching outfits.

Me and mom cooking. See the matching outfits.

We spent the evening eating and drinking, playing board games and watching awful embarassing home videos where I’m 13 and wearing the worst clothes ever. On Sunday morning I woke up to the scent of bacon that my father was cooking for breakfast. I never cook bacon at home but at my parents’ it’s like a tradition to have it for breakfast. After eating we headed to forest to seek mushrooms, but they were all hiding! We only got a few chanterelles.

After the forest it was time to eat again! This time grilled sausages, pork, zucchini, corn and pineapple.

It’s mid August and it’s so autumny here. I guess it’ll be quite chilly next week in Lapland, now the temps are around +10C there.

rowan tree at my parents' garden

rowan tree in my parents garden

apple tree in my parents garden

I learned this weekend that my mother’s twin sister doesn’t have endo. In fact there was never nothing wrong with her, but her husband. Hearing this felt like 100 kilos off my shoulders; we aren’t a completely barren family after all. Maybe there is hope for me too. We have our first RE appointment finally on Thursday and I hope to be know much more after it.

Now I have to go. Guess where? Cooking of course 😀

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As I promised…

August 14, 2008

Here’s a visual of my new RED hair! Not the best pic (nor face) but hey it was taken 7.00 AM before leaving for work.
I managed to book an appointment to the chinese acupuncturist already for tomorrow afternoon! I’m really looking forward to it, because he said on the phone that acupuncture should help with endometriosis. And tomorrow is Friday so no work for two days! That means a movie on dvd, good food and red wine tomorrow with DH, on Saturday a short visit to DH’s dad because we’re leaving our cats there for our holiday (only a week away!!) then drive to my parents and go hunting for mushrooms in the forest (I bought myself red rubber boots yesterday for forest trips). And probably consume massive amounts of great food and some wine too…

As mentioned, I have still some holidays left for this summer (if I didn’t have any holidays, my head would probably explode, not because of a massive workload but because of massive boredom). That is 1,5 weeks, starting on the 25th. We’re going hiking to the northernmost Finland and possibly Norway too. This is a trip I’ve been really waiting for; the incredible sceneries and vast peaceful nature with only a few people around. I’ve been there a couple of times before and it’s breathtaking. I just hope the weather will be nice and we won’t have to freeze our asses in the tent with -5C or pouring rain!

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Kick-ass bitch

August 13, 2008

I enrolled to a kickboxing class, it’ll start next Tuesday! I’m going with a friend and it’s only 100m away from our house so I possibly can’t allow myself any excuses for not going there. No more slouching on the couch with reality shows! I used to do karate back in the teen years and thaiboxing a few years ago and it was so much fun, I hope this will be too. And hope to get some of those anxieties, stress and aggressions out of me! This is one step towards my old self. Next I’ll dye my hair back to screaming red 😀

My visit to the homeopathic doctor was quite a disappointment this time. She seemed to be clueless with what to do with me, and we only increased my dosage of sepia, no new remedies were prescribed. It felt like 70 euros flushed in the toilet. I’m thinking about switching from her to the acupunction since it seems much more efficient. I already emailed one chinese acupuncturist near us about his timetables and the costs, hopefully he’ll answer soon.

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A visit to the Reflexologist

August 12, 2008

I had a visit to the reflexologist again. Maybe my 4th or 5th, not quite sure anymore when was the first time. I love that lady. She has endo too and wasn’t able to get pregnant even with ivf but she’s definetely not bitter nor sad. She told me that the clinic we chose has had really good reviews and people have told that the staff there is very friendly and compassionate, which unfortunately isn’t the case in public hospital where she was treated. That’s one reason I don’t want to go to the public doctors. Not only I would have to wait 6 months for the treatments to begin, but unfortunately the doctors on public sector tend not to see you as a person with feelings, only as a patient with a disease and they have too many patients to take care of. I know it would cost almost nothing to go to the public hospital for IF treatments but I think this is a subject where money doesn’t matter that much.

The spots on my right foot were much more achy than the ones in left, so maybe my body is a bit out of balance. Anyway it was soooo relaxing and nice again, to lay under a blanket and have somebody massage your ears and feet. Today I have the appointment for the homeopathy doctor, she’s a nice lady too and talking with her last time was really therapeutic. I’m curious what kind of homeopathic medicine she’ll offer, because last time she was talking about some remedies that might help.

I’m also thinking about having acupuncture. I’ve had it done a few times before and it’s really relaxing and helped my blood pressure instantly by lowering it for some 10 units in a few minutes. I guess I’m a bit of a junkie for these alternative treatments too 😉